Fran Lebowitz's Library

  Fran Lebowitz is a very funny person who has a very serious library of around 12,000 books. It is not the kind of library one would expect from someone kicked out of school twice, mostly because of "nonspecific surliness" or general petulance. She became an atheist at 7 and has smoked since she was 12, but is still around at 75. You may have seen her on Letterman or Leno, or even on Fallon or Maher. If you read anything about her or by her, you will laugh a lot. See, Fran Lebowitz on Wikipedia for starters. It doesn't mention that she owns a Checker Marathon, which seems about right.
   Almost ten years ago, she answered some questions about her library and some of them are presented below.
 
[When you saw her name above, you may have thought of that other Jewish New Yorker, the famous photographer who ran into financial trouble a few years ago and whose photo collection caused a real kerfuffle out in Nova Scotia. She is Annie Lebovitz, with a V not a W.]

From: "Fran Lebowitz: By the Book". The New York Times. March 21, 2017.

How do you organize your books?

  My books are organized first by category. Fiction, letters, essays. Those kinds of categories. And then there are many subdivisions. Then within categories, they’re alphabetized. I always have arguments with the guy who helps me organize my books, because I have a biography section. He says: “You can’t have a biography section. You have to have them arranged by writer. For instance, Henry James’s fiction, then the letters, the biographies, etc.” And I say: “I know. That’s the right way to do it. But that would take up too much space.” All the apartments I buy or rent are for my books, not for myself. I don’t need the space. I’m 5-foot-4. I have a whole bookcase that this guy calls “your crazy books.” The crazy book category. Those books are not alphabetized.

   I also have a large reference library. I have numerous encyclopedias; I have many, many dictionaries. I actually bought myself the Encyclopaedia Britannica in 1978. I always wanted it, and when I wrote my first book and had some money, I bought it. I didn’t have it growing up; I had the World Book, because it was less expensive. The Encyclopaedia Britannica was so hard to buy, I can’t tell you. I had to make one million phone calls. Because it was generally sold on an installment plan. They didn’t know how to send these books to someone who is just going to send a check.

Nobody uses these books anymore, but I do. When the second edition of the O.E.D. came out, there was nothing I wanted more. It was like $10,000. I had a friend who owned a bookstore, and I begged her to let me buy it at cost, and she did. It was still several thousand dollars, but I’m delighted to own it, even though I think it’s now free on the internet.

You’re in the process of moving your personal library. What’s that been like?

   Believe me, I’m not in the process of it yet. Because it’s so awful, I keep putting it off. But I just did it a year and a half ago. They come and pack the books. That takes three days. But two times before that, it took two months to organize them first. I have many bookcases. They have glass doors. They are mostly 19th-century. The books all go in certain places in my apartment. I like to have fiction in the living room, reference books in the writing room. I have 10,000 books. I know this because I move them. When I move, I go through them and take some out. Many books come to this house unbidden. And unbidden books, I don’t want to keep them. Once the books are all rearranged, I can put my hand on any book. I know where they all are.

When do you read?

   Pretty much all the time. Especially if I’m supposed to be doing something else. I was very frequently punished for reading as a child because I was reading when I was supposed to be doing homework. I got in trouble in school for reading, I got in trouble at home for reading. My mother would actually bang on my door and say, “I know you’re reading in there!” In my adult life, I’ve gotten in trouble for reading because I’m not writing when I’m reading. So it’s really rare that reading is unaccompanied by guilt for me. But I’ve learned to live with it. I feel guilty pretty much all the time.

How do you like to read? Paper or electronic? One book at a time or several simultaneously?

   Obviously, paper. I mean, actually, on his show once, Jimmy Fallon gave me a Kindle. He actually gave it to me as a present. I said: “I know you gave me this because I don’t have one. You know what else I don’t have? A Bentley.”

   I don’t think they’re horrible. I don’t object to them. I’m just not interested in them. People are always showing me this stuff like I’m from outer space and I’ve never heard of it. I have really bad eyesight, so they always tell me you can make the type bigger. I suppose that would be a good thing for me, but I don’t care. I’d rather squint.

"The only monogamous relationship I have had 
in my life is with my car."

You’re organizing a literary dinner party. Which three writers, dead or alive, do you invite?

   None. I would never do it. My idea of a great literary dinner party is Fran, eating alone, reading a book. That’s my idea of a literary dinner party. When I eat alone, I spend a lot of time, before I sit down to my meager meal, choosing what to read. And I’m a lot better choosing a book than preparing a meal. And I never eat anything without reading. Ever. If I’m eating an apple, I have to get a book.

Postscript:
  I see that this is the third private library in a row that I have presented, which is curated by a woman. The other two: Hannah Arendt and Marilyn Monroe!