BEARDS (again)

 Scruffy Stubble

While attempting to avoid reading anything about the two most important people of our time (if not of all time), I ran across two pieces concerning beards. You may have noticed we are surrounded by them. Most men either sport one or are raising a crop of facial hair, which, while looking unkempt, appears to be carefully tended. 

Having coincidentally stumbled upon a subject which would offer readers a distraction from anything relating to those two people, I was prepared to go full monty on hirsuteness when I discovered that beards have been fully covered in MM. Back in the spring of 2023 I conducted a poll involving bearded golfers, who probably learned beard growing from hockey players. Of course, much more about hairiness was provided, including a reference to Pogonologia; or, A Philosophical and Historical Essay on Beards, as well as a picture of William Empson’s “neck beard.” (While it is unlikely you missed that good essay, you may have forgotten it, as I did, so here it is, “Beard Poll.” I also have done one about Empson, but it was not about his “neck beard” - “William Empson’s Memory”.) 

Let’s Play “Beaver”

About the two new beard pieces you are probably very curious so I will begin now with the one that is not very new, but shows that beards have always been fashionable – or not. This observation indicates that by the mid-1920s, beards were becoming unpopular and that, before the Internet, people looked at something other than screens when walking.

   “The men usually affected beards, until the sudden craze for ‘Beaver’ made them return to the razor. Two or more people walking down a street would play a twenty-point game of beaver-counting. The first to cry ‘Beaver’ at the sight of a beard won a point, but white beards (known as ‘polar beavers’) and other distinguished sorts had higher values. When the growing scarcity of beards ended the game in 1924 King George, distinguished foreigners, and a few Chelsea pensioners were for some years almost the only bearded men left in Great Britain. Beards came in again, chiefly among the Leftists, in the middle Thirties.” (The Long Week-End: A Social History of Great Britain 1918-1939, by Robert Graves & Alan Hodge. Norton Library, 1963, p.49) Being unshorn became popular again in the ‘60s and ‘70s, but after the hippies, the yuppies wanted to look clean so they could be successful. Although there are now many beards and “Beaver” could be played, we have the Internet. 

Beards Fad or Fetish?

    The second piece is a current one and it shows that the pressure to be bearded is intense and the fad a global one. The young man featured in this article flew to Turkey to get a beard transplant. Since you may not believe me, here is the information directly from the source:

“French Man Dies by Suicide After Failed Beard Transplant by 'estate agent’,” National Post, Oct. 28, 2024.
“A French student died by suicide after receiving a failed beard transplant in Istanbul from someone allegedly pretending to be a surgeon.

“In March 2024, 24-year-old Mathieu Vigier Latour travelled to Istanbul for a beard transplant. He was studying business in Paris at the time.

According to the Daily Mail, the cost of the transplant was around $1,950, only a fifth of the price it would be if getting the procedure done in France….

The plan was to remove 4,000 hair grafts from the back of his head and move them to his face. Jacques said the surgery caused his son's hair to grow and be shaped unnaturally…

After the procedure, Latour's beard was reportedly oddly shaped and grew at an unnatural angle, like a "hedgehog."....

He said Latour was suffering both mentally and physically.

"He was in pain, suffered from burns, and he couldn't sleep," he said in French.

The family tried to find a qualified expert in France to help correct the failed transplant. After being unsuccessful, they found Dr. Jean Devroye, a hair transplant specialist based in Belgium.

Devroye examined Latour and found that 1,000 out of the 4,000 hair grafts that were removed from his scalp would not grow back. He also concluded that Latour would have permanent scarring….

My advice here is that, unless you are from the very large cohort of males who are required by some higher authority to have a beard, you should avoid getting a beard transplant, at least one done in Turkey.

Photo Credit It is extremely difficult to avoid articles about one of the most important people in the world and that is why I noticed the picture of his underling which is featured above. He may have grown that bit of stubble because of the social pressure or to honour his Appalachian ancestors who couldn’t afford razors. (The photograph by Mark Peterson is found in the New Yorker.) Mr. Vance will be the first VP with facial hair since Charles Curtis who had only a moustache. Benjamin Harrison was the last fully bearded president. The stance which the new president may adopt regarding facial hair appears to have changed and will likely do so again since he is consistent when it comes to stance changing. The other most important person in the world appears to approve of beards because she is dating a guy who has one. Sources: You now know about Charles Curtis because of the following article. The cleverness of the title reveals why it is hidden behind a paywall. One should have to pay for such things: “Hair Apparent: J.D. Vance Could Bring Beards Back to the White House,” Will Pavia, The Times, July 18, 2024. More proof of the ubiquitousness of beards is found not just on faces but also in the many articles about them: “Women in India Protest Against Men Having Beards - To Stop Chafing,” Sophie Thompson, Independent Online, Oct. 21, 2024. For an increasing number of young men arriving on this continent it appears that beards are mandatory. They would not be welcome in Turkmenistan: “The Country Where Beards Are Forbidden For People Under 40 Years of Age and Only White Cars Can Be Driven,” CE Noticias Financieras, Sept. 20, 2024. “In addition, men under the age of 40 are not allowed to grow beards, a measure that seeks to homogenize the image of citizens and prevent what the government considers "personal carelessness". These rules reflect the authoritarian control in the country, where individual freedoms are limited by rules that often seem incomprehensible from the outside.”